Terrible Toddler Tantrum at Target
Easter 2014
Say that five times.. “Terrible Toddler Tantrum at Target”. Yes’ it happened and I may have caused a seen with my reaction, but I actually can pat myself on the back for following through- which I think is the most important lesson.
So the story begins yesterday morning. My three older kids headed off to school, and then my hubby, my youngest (Evin-4), and I, loaded up in the van to take my hubs to work. After I dropped him off at work I headed to the court house to pay a ticket (which just so happened to start off my frustrating morning). I remembered how arrogant the cop was that pulled me over, and how condensending he spoke to me, but that is another story- another time. So I went to pay my ticket and then Evin and I loaded back up in the van to head to Target. I really only was going to Target to check out DUH’ “Bullseye’s Playground” aka “The dollar Spot” and get some paper towels. We pulled into the parking lot and parked the car. I went over my little rules with Evin, like I normally do. “We are going into the store to get want mom needs, and you are not getting anything, so don’t ask!” “Your going to be good and listen to me or we will turn around and leave, do you understand?” (I should just hit play each time we go to any store where dollar toys and toy isles exist).
So Evin responded in his cute voice “Yes!” I opened his van door and grabbed his hand and he jumped down. We ventured into the store, I grabbed my cart, and told Evin to stay next to me at all times. We sifted through the tangled dollar spot and it was pretty picked over. I saw a gentlemen unpacking a whole new shipment of boxes that just arrived (rats I was an hour to early!). Then my son came up to me with some toy gun/water gun of some sort. I half looked at it and said No! put it back! he immediatly whined and said “I want it.” I told him “No!” again, “and reminded him- remember, I told you don’t ask for a thing!” he whines once more, crinkled over his shoulders, and did a one leg stomp. “Please I want it!” I told him no two more times… and he began to whine louder and stomp now “two legs” instead of one. I started to push the cart that now had two items in it, away from the “evil” dollar spot (you know its’s evil, it gets us all.. including our kids). As I pushed it away to go get paper towels. My son followed with the same darn gun in his hands. I turned and told him “No!” once agian, but even louder and more firm. He then went into full out fit, now begging, whining, saying please over and over again, I want it!!!” stomping, jumping up and down, totally flipping out. I firmed up and said “We are not doing this today, I told you that we weren’t doing this. “Now we are leaving” I just pushed the cart to the side and left it, I grabboed his arm just above his wrist, and said “we are leaving!” He full on freaked and was screaming and crying and begging to stay, apologizing. Other moms were all around the check out, dollar spot, cart pick up, and food court. I could feel them all looking as I had the child of satan now in my grasp. I know I was projecting the look of fierce devil woman myself (but did not care). However, I was persistant and I stormed out of there, with his lurking, jumping, sagging little butt (@$$)… I am now repeating myself even louder “I told you that if you asked and acted up, we would leave and I meant it!” I know others around could hear me as they looked on (bleh!).
He continued to throw his fit all the way to the van, more strangers were entering and existing the store and more eyes were upon us. I didn’t care, I kept my firm grip and marched firmly with the toad to the van. He stood in front of the van still flopping, jumping up and down and screaming- “I am sorry, I will be good!” and begging that we stay. He did this while another couple were parked across from us loading up their car. I am now in the drivers seat, telling him to get in, all the while facing him in front of the van. He is insistant on staying and continually freaking out in the parking lot. I tell him as I shut my car door “I am leaving, get in!” he says “No!”and keeps saying sorry and begging to stay. So I push the button in the van to open his van door and tell him again to get in. He stepped forward one step, still flipping out, but not getting in. So I started the car, and he stepped forward one more step, still acting possesed, but adamant that we still stay. Then I start to inch forward in my vehicle and he screams “OK! OK! I’ll get in!” so he climbs in, and I could hardly wait to silence all the noise from the world. I told him, “I told you that if you asked for anything or acted up, we would leave, and you were naughty and didn’t listen!” He was still extremely upset and apologizing left and right, swearing he would be good and begging to go back. I continued to go over how we don’t act like that, and I drove around the parking lot. After we drove around and I waited for him to calm down, I told him that if he were good we would go into the dollar store (as I needed to get a few things). I explained that he has one more chance to show me that he can listen and behave while I shop. We went into the dollar store, and shopped and he was a perfect angel. He got a light up ball from mom at the end of our shopping trip for good behavior (and because I am a sucker and he is my baby).
Sighhhhhhh….. The end.
P.S. I have to say out of all “4” of my kids I have only “experienced” 4 maybe 5 other “bad” tantrums, but I got lucky because the others all happened at home.
Dang those are tough moments! Good for you for hanging in there and following through.
I remember those days and it did get easy after working the “rules”. My oldest of 3 sons was the spoiled brat in stores and it was not from parenting… it was from a childless aunt who refused to listen to us and our rules, When she was finished lavishing him with gifts every week, along with lousy McDonald’s meals while shopping with her, we had to deal with the rotten poisonous after effect . (only him, while she ignored his brother and left him home) When he shopped with me he was a monster. I’d carry him kicking me all the way to the car. So, I put him in his car seat and brought him home. As years passed, the older Mr. Want-His-Way treated Mz. Wicked Witchy Aunt with complete disrespect. He even stole money from her. He wasn’t that way with us as a teen, but his Aunt went through her own growing pains dealing with her damage. She was so devastated her favorite nephew took advantage of her! Boo hoo. (smirk, sorry … it was deserved) My younger sons may have had one or two store fits with me very young, but they ended up with nothing those rare times and learned from it. To this day, both have turned out respectful and hard workers who appreciate everything. Unfortunately, my oldest has a lot of maturing to do. I stepped on that aunt’s toes and set her straight so many times, that we are now divorced. Yay! (Yes, I had a party.) Her and my ex-husband can deal with the lack of child rearing skills. A 33 year old still wanting his way or doesn’t see you is still a brat. I tried damage control with him and lost (actually they lost and I could write a book about it). You did great and don’t hesitate to do it again… if he didn’t learn this time. But, I bet Evin is really sorry. Kudos, Mom!!! You’ve got four and you are the BOSS! 😀
Thank you Robin for sharing all that with me. Truly sometimes it take a village to raise our kids, and we can only “do our best”. Some learn and grow and gain respect and some don’t. Glad there was some good in the end, even if the other one needs more learning or needs a life altering experience. Take care, jen